This is one of the movie I am looking forward to the most this summer. With Fast Five, they finally ditched the car porn aspect of the franchise that I never cared about in favor of being the dumbest blockbuster film full of beautifully crafted spectacles that are so amazingly stupid that it warrants multiple viewings for drinking game purposes. Justin Lin realized his past mistakes of trying to add any sort of character depth and instead went with the approach of delivering the most coherent two hours of vehicular mayhem and meat heads wrestling each other on top of moving trains.
So naturally I could expect the same from the game of the same title, right? Here’s the trailer.
Wait, where is the tank surfing mission? Where’s the button to set off the explosive charges you presumably would place under bridges in this world? WHY IS THERE DRIFTING IN THIS GAME AND WHY DO I NEED TO CHANGE RIMS? It’s like the developers still think The Fast & The Furious franchise is about cars and races AND NOT ABOUT JUMPING FROM ROOFTOP TO ROOFTOP TO CHASE AFTER BAIL JUMPERS OR GUNNING DOWN DRUG LORDS. Way to miss the mark, Kabam Studio. You had the chance of a life time to bring Saints Row the Third quality game to the tablet and phone devices, but instead took the coward’s way out by delivering “just another movie license” crap. I hate you.
Written by Daniel Lee